Paddy and Andy's Trans-European Trek

Chapter in new Lonely Planet Book!

2008-08-18T13:40:00.000-07:00

If you would like to read a bit more about our walk please have a look at the new Lonely Planet book called Flightless: Incredible Journeys Without Leaving the Ground. We are very honoured to have been asked to write a chapter alongside some absolute legends like Jason Lewis and Al Humphreys.

5th of November 2006

2006-11-10T06:52:00.000-08:00

While Paddy flew home to relax with home comforts I still had one challenge left to do. Well actually a few, the first being to try in my horrid horrid horrid hung-over state to get on a plane from Istanbul to New York without re decorating the taxi or giving British Airways a new paint job. Then there was the 26.2 miles that i had to run, without any training (well running anyway).

The marathon itself was fantastic fun and a brilliant atmosphere. I started very well and although stiff from a week off walking in Istanbul I was feeling confident about making it around the streets of New York.

The first 12 miles went very well and I kept up with the 3 hour 15 minute pace group and although there was no hope of keeping up the pace the whole way I was sure to get a good time. Then I felt a horrific pain spread up my leg and I literally collapsed on the side of the road. The long and the short of it was that I think I have re-fractured my leg from my previous injury in France. I did however manage to hobble around the remaining 14 miles and reach the finish line in 5 hours 12 minutes. Certainly no record but it was one of the most painful and hardest things I have had to do and it made walking to Asia look and feel like a Sunday afternoon stroll!

Just like to say a massive thank you to my supporters along the way, Ems, Charlie, Davina, Willem, Kate and the Red Cross/Realbuzz team, I am almost certain I wouldn’t have finished without your encouragement! This the last marathon i am doing without any training, i think i have learnt my lesson....

31st October

2006-11-01T05:51:00.000-08:00

We have reached Asia! Having some computer issues but blog update to follow very shortly...

In the meantime have a look at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GY4Eld-PHhk

25th October 2006

2006-10-25T03:00:00.000-07:00

Hello all! As you can see from the above photo we are now wıthın an ıncredıbley tıny dıstance from Istanbul. We have been gettıng progressıvely excıted for the past few days knowıng that we could complete the walk ın one bıg day's walk. However, we are drawıng out the excıtement for as long as we can and, ıf we stıck to our schedule we wıll arrıve on the out skırts of the town tonıght, and the centre ın three days tıme.

Lots and lots has hapened over the past week or so, ıncludıng meetıng the chap seen ın the photo below. He and hıs frıend have cycled all the way from Korea, leavıng a few days before we left Trafalgar Square. I would recommend hıs websıte ıf your Korean ıs up to scratch. It can be found at www.eurasia2006.com. We have also met a cyclıst who had spent the past month travellıng up from Syrıa, so I guess we must now be on the maın long-dıstance route between Europe and Asıa.

The next blog wıll come from Istanbul. Thanks for all the support- We needed to keep to an ıncredıbly tıght schedule over the past three months, and we couldn't have done ıt wıthout your help.

(50kms walk, 2 kebabs, and 3 cans of Efes all ın one day? It's too much for Andy)

18th October

2006-10-19T06:47:00.000-07:00

I'm goıng to have to keep thıs blog faırly brıef. Thıs slıghtly thırd-world computer ıs causıng me all sorts of headaches and however much you all want to know what we're up to, I value my sanıty over and above your curıosıtıes.

Fırstly I'm sure you're all wonderıng what has happened to the dots above my I's. Well they don't have them here and that's that. Be satısfıed that I've crossed the t's. But where's 'here'? Here ıs Turkey!

Yes, after almost 160 days we have marched happıly ınto our 11th and fınal country. We left Bulgarıa about 2 days ago and snuck across a lıttle slıver of Greece ınto Turkey and thus were ın three countrıes ın a lıttle less than 24 hours. The latter half of Bulgarıa went by ın a blur of rubbısh-fılled fıelds, dead dogs, and cheap beer. It's best summed up wıth the same sort of sentıments as those that we had for Serbıa. Wonderful people, but what are you all playıng at? Sort ıt out, ok?

It seems lıke years sınce we were ın Sofıa though ın fact ıt was only about 10 days ago. We've sımply been keepıng our heads down and trampıng along as hard as we can. There are varıous reasons for thıs. Not only does Andy have a marathon to run, but people are comıng to Istanbul and we mustn't be late. But perhaps the maın reason for our ıncrease ın pace ıs the rıdıculous temperatures. It only needs the nıght-tıme temperatures to drop another degree or two for the surroundıng countrysıde to be lıttered wıth our frostbıtten extremıtıes. But wıth just 8 days to do the remaınıng 270kms we'll keep our fıngers crossed whıle we stıll have them.

We hope to be on the ınternet agaın ın a few days to pop up a couple more lınes of blog. Keep checkıng and, more ımportantly, tell everyone you know that ıf they haven't yet donated then they're the reason that two poor ramblers cry themselves to sleep each nıght, shelterıng ın hedgerows as snowstorms rage across the countrysıde. See ıf that works at all.

Other than the above there's not a huge deal to report. Plus we're goıng to keep a bıt of an embargo on the news ın a cunnıng ruse to force you all to attend our party to hear how the last stages went. So keep the 25th November free, and we look forward to seeıng you all remarkably soon.

I hope you're all well, as, I suspect, does Andy.

Regards from us both.

6th October 2006

2006-10-06T08:40:00.000-07:00

Hello! Many apologies for the lack of blog updates for the last few weeks but we have been on the road covering the huge distance from Belgrade to Sofia in Bulgaria.

Since leaving Belgrade we headed due south for the first time towards the town of Nis in southern Serbia. The route took us firstly across the mountains just south of Belgrade and then along the river Niska towards it's source across the Bulgarian border. Serbia was an interesting country and had given us a real taste for the Eastern culture change we have experienced with crazy 'turbo folk' music, the ability to turn any fruit into an intoxicating liquid and the massive poverty levels that are abundant in the countryside regions. The countryside has been beautiful but unfortunately the huge amounts of rubbish that line the roads, even in the depths of the countryside have put a huge dampener on the walking. The government can not afford to provide any form of rubbish disposal except in the main cities and so people are forced to burn and dump their rubbish in every possible location, including their gardens. That, combined with the huge stray dog population, has meant that we have been forced to use our walking sticks as weapons rather than to help us along the very uneven roads!

The walk from Nis up into the mountains towards the Bulgarian border was breath-takingly beautiful as our road lead us up a steep gorge with tunnels and rock ledges and some staggering views. The only problem was that our road was the only road to Bulgaria from that region of Serbia and so it was home to a continuous flow of lorries moving their goods from Bulgaria, Turkey, Hungary and Iran into the west. We have been forced many a time to dive from the road into whatever lay beyond the concrete to miss almost certain death from the thundering freight trains that past us at immense speeds.

We have also been plagued with an extraordinary hot end to the summer here with temperatures reaching well above 32 degrees. I hate to think of the ratio of water intake to the amount that literally spurts from our bodies over a 7 hour walk. Alas our prayers for cooler weather have been answered and the summer has in the last few days come to a quick end with incredibly cold nights and torrential downpours. The walk for the next three weeks is looking very uninviting but hopefully the excitement of being so close to the finish will pull us through.

Bulgaria has brought many new things to our walk. Another stamp has been added to the passport and we have even experienced our first time change since reaching Calais but more importantly we have seen our first road signs to Istanbul!!!!! This caused immense excitement from us at the border to the extent that the border guards that had just admitted us almost rounded us up and deported us back to Serbia in a flash thinking we might have MMD (Mad Mosquito Disease - the Serbians answer to mad cow disease!).

Now let me tell you about George...
We met George outside a small town on the main road into Sofia. We were plodding along as usual when we heard a great cry and frantic waving coming from the garden next to us. Slightly surprised and with a quick glance around to check it was directed to us we ventured in to say hello. We were met but a big bounding Bulgarian guy who could apart from the colour of his skin have easily been mistaken for Shrek. Accompanying him was a elderly man, who we assumed to be his father but who was only about 5ft tall and half the size of George. Not speaking a word of English didn't stop George from inviting us to sit down as he disappeared into his house in a fit of hysterics before reappearing with an armful of fruit and vegetables for us - this included a watermelon, tomatoes, apples and bag full of walnuts! Why people see two backpackers already buckling under the weight of their loads and immediately think we must give them more to carry still baffles us. Then about 10 seconds later George's father coming scuttling out with a variety of glasses and sets them down in front of us, 2 of which were shot glasses. Paddy and I exchanged glances, both concerned about the further 3 hours walk in the mid-day sun that we had to complete. Those concerned glances couldn't have been more justified, considering the events that followed. The pure home brew liquid that we were fed, weighing in at no less than 150% proof, almost evaporated before we even had chance to tuck into the rather generous 60 ml helping that we were both given. Well needless to say for Queen and Country we both immediately lifted our glasses in a toast to which George, in a moment that could only have come from 'Withnail & I', pipes up with 'chin chin'! Trying to hold the hysterics we put away most of the glass in one go only to almost fall off our chairs with the incredible potency of the grape based liquor. It numbed our brains and legs within a few seconds and burned not only our nostrils, mouths, throat but then proceeded to dissolve the contents of my stomach and its lining. We managed to finish our glasses and wash it down with some water before saying our goodbyes and heading back onto the road. At this point George, who had obviously been on the juice for most of the afternoon embraced Paddy and, sobbing, began kissing him on the cheeks! I narrowly escaped the kisses with a clever move but had my hand squeezed so tight that I almost wished I had taken the previous option. In my pissed state I decided the watermelon was an absolute necessity and packed it into the top of my rucksack and stumbled down the road in all sorts of directions untill I sobered up enough an hour later to collapse and eat it. George was another classic example of the exemplary hospitality that we have seen throughout the Balkans but was certainly in a league of his own.

Sofia, which we staggered into yesterday, is a very different and impressive city. The outskirts were muich the same as the rest of the big towns that one finds in these parts, but the city centre is affluent, buzzing, and attractive. Admittedly, a young lady tried to pick-pocket me yesterday, but she did it very politely and wasn't the least offended when i wouldn't give her my things. We're staying in a nice little hostel, where we were welcomed with booze and food and a short history of everything Bulgarian, and much as we would like to stay here for a few more days we have sadly got to push on. A slight peice of mis-mapsmanship has somehow lost us a day (or was it all that homebrew?) so were are going to have a furious pace from here on. We were also informed yesterday that it's going to rain for about a million years starting today (it has, indeed, been pouring all day) so that'll add a fun new aspect to the walk. Still, our spirits are high and we are neither bruised nor battered, but just a little tired. We are nearly as close to the end of the walk as London is to Edinburgh, which is, now that i come to think about it, not actually a very comforting way of looking at it. Wish us luck!

Paddy's Party Blog

Right. Enough of Andy's tourism nonsense. Let's all talk business for a second. The party is now completely confirmed for the evening of the 25th of November. Write it in your diaries now, because you'll feel like such plonkers if you end up having to go else-where and someone else wins the 48" plasma screen TV, or whatever it is which happens to be top prize. (Just to clarify, we don't actualy have a 48" plasma screen TV yet, but if anyone reading this happens to work for Sony, Panasonic, etc, or if they have a dodgey relative who works out of a transit van down East Hackney way and might be able to get his hands on that sort of clobber, then let us know).

To get an idea of what we do have in our raffle, go, as always, to our website where you will see all sorts of exciting brands scrolling across the top of your screen. We also have a chap who, at this very instant, is dreaming up all sorts of exciting canapes and nibbles to stop the bubbly (that'll be beer obviously, unless you win any of the bottles of champangne) from going to your heads.

I must also take this opportunity to remind you all of our dates for arriving in Istanbul, and for crossing into Asia. Drinking buddies are coming from as far afield as Russia to help us party the walking out of our systems. We'll get to town on the 28th (a weekend, dear workers) and then cross into Asia on the 31st. If you think you're up to the task of joining our ever-increasing band of volunteers, then give us a ring and we'll tell you all the details. It's a city that's well worth a visit, even if you don't want to hang out with smelly ramblers.

Anyway, lastly, as always, thankyou to all the sponsors. It's been an incredibly profitable week, and though we shan't embarass anyone here, we all know where the fundraising page is to be found, and that the donors are all listed at the bottom, so thank you again, really and truly, to everyone for their wonderful, generous, kindly and unexpected support.

We hope you are all as well as can be, and (for the first time in a blog) look forward to seeing you in the not-too-distant future! What a strange thought.

Paddy and Andy

20th September 2006

2006-09-20T04:11:00.000-07:00

Zdravo!

After extensive passport checks and our first border stamps we have reached Serbia! There has been a dramatic culture change and we are now truly in the depths of Eastern Europe. We are currently in Belgrade after a long 7 days of solid walking since our last blog update from Croatia. It has been an interesting week with on-the-spot police checks, drinking sessions with the locals of backcountry villages and the crossing of our first minefield!

The first of our 'on the spot' police checks came 4 kms from the Serbia border and took us rather by surprise at 6 in the morning! We were peacefully plodding along after an early start on a road that would lead us to the Croatian border town, when in the distance we heard sirens and saw blue flashing lights in a cloud of dust racing towards us. We were forced to surrender our documents by the 4 heavily armed officers who leaped out of the car. They looked very disappointed when we didn’t take off across the fields so that they could take chase or even have some target practice! However they were very impressed with our efforts and quickly sent us on our way.

In our first Serbian city of Sremska Mitrovica we met a lady that spoke very good English and she immediately warned us of the trouble that we would have in Serbia if we were not careful. This is partly due to the role that the UK had in the NATO force that heavily bombed areas of the country during the war in 1991. However so far her views have been as far from the truth as possible and we have met incredibly generous and nice people who have always been amazed at our adventure and how far we have come. Once again we have been treated to a whole host of freebies ranging from beer to donunts which has kept us motivated on the road.

The only other news to report is that over the last week we have twice been thought to be Russian! I can only assume that this is because of our dirty, bearded appearance and our attempt to speak Serbian! The roads are so full of diesel fumes and dust from the old cars and lorries that our lungs are about to give up and are voices become rather deeper than normal. We have however had a chance to clean up our appearance now we are in Belgrade for 2 nights while we await a diplomatic bag from England full of new maps to get us to Istanbul.

The end is truly in sight and within the next week we shall have walked further than the straight-line distance between London and the North Pole ! Just 6 weeks of solid walking lie between us and Istanbul now! Thank you once again for all those of you that have sponsored us over the last few weeks. It is great moral boost and reminds us when we are in a low spot why we are doing this marathon effort and bring us back on track. Please encourage all your friends that have not sponsored us to log on to www.justgiving.com/paddymorris help us try and reach our £10,000 target.

As promised we also have an update on our party

Hours of day dreaming while we endure our endless march across Europe has lead to some rather productive party planning for our (hopefully) triumphant return to London in November.

On the 25th of November we shall be having a massive fundraising party in London. We have already, thanks to the invaluable help of a couple of friends and family, been able to secure a number of fabulous prizes for our raffle. A fancy Belgrave venue has been booked, caterers consulted and Oddbins warned to double their Christmas stock order! There will also be photos, videos, endless story-telling and for the geography minded of you, hundreds of maps!

The dress code changes hourly but be sure that it will get you out of your Monday to Friday suits and is certain to take Belgravia by surprise!

Obviously invitations are a little tricky with us being on the road 6 days a week so don't expect a fancy invite through the door quite yet but everyone is of course invited so please keep evening of the 25th of November free.

Andy and Paddy

10th September

2006-09-12T06:36:00.000-07:00

Hello! By the time you read this blog we shall be crossing the Croatian border in to Serbia. Since leaving Zagreb over a week ago, we have been racing in the straightest line possible towards Belgrade. This included a quick trip into Bosnia to add another country to the ever growing list.

Over the past couple of weeks we have been increasingly aware of just how close to Asia we are starting to become. With people now booking flights to Istambul for our crossing of the finish line, we thought it prudent to have a reckoning of just how much of the job there is left for us to do. Thanks to some astonishingly detailed map work carried out by our Surrey office, we can present you the following vital statistics:

In the next forty seven days we must walk 1,320km through three more countries. Although we will still allow ourselves one day each week for laundry, a shower and blog updates, we will otherwise be covering at the very least 35km or seven hours walking every day until the end of next month. Although that might not sound too much to you folk reading this from the comfort of your desks, think of this as walking between Sloan Square and Crazy Larry’s, twelve and a bit times every day, carrying sixteen bottles of wine on your back, for the next seven and a half weeks - sober. Ok, it’s still better than being an accountant.

This endurance rate is taking its toll on our bodies. Paddy has been hit with tendonitis, whilst I continue to wake with cramp in the night caused by being a foot too long for my tiny tent. It will be both a mental and physical challenge to keep up this pace to Istanbul, but a challenge we look forward to facing. Keep sponsorship and texts raining in as it really boosts moral, and keeps us motivated.

Croatia, meanwhile has been fascinating. We didn’t realise the extent to which the Balkan wars had affected the whole of the eastern half of the country. Every village through which we pass shows the clear signs of recent conflict. In the poorer regions, where repair and reconstruction is less common, every house front is pock-marked with bullet holes, and every second paving slab is shattered by mortar rounds. While in the more affluent areas the damage has been completely repaired with new breeze-block houses lining the roads, there is still the anti-Serbian graffiti, black-clad widows, and road-side memorials, which is so unexpected in communities that are, don’t forget, within walking distance from London!

This not withstanding, the people have been welcoming, friendly and generous to an extraordinary degree. Not half an hour ago we were beckoned in to a village bar for a free lunch (thanks Krono), free drinks, and sent away with bundles of chocolate bars which we are trying to munch our way through before they all melt in the afternoon heat.

However the novelty of being stopped in every village, by upwards of twenty people, to ask us what we are doing is wearing thin and slowing our pace dramatically. We are longing for the hopefully less populated mountain passes of Bulgaria where we can wander undisturbed and not feel like the local celebrities.

All that remains, before we say farewell for another few days, is to tell you all to keep the evening of the 25th November free. We will be having an enormous party in London, and everyone’s invited. More details to come next week.

So thanks once again for all the sponsorship and encouragement, its hugely appreciated.

Kind regards

Paddy and Andy

5th September 2006

2006-09-05T02:34:00.000-07:00

Well, another blog, another country. This one comes to you from Zagreb, in Croatia, where we are enjoying another of our none-too-frequent days off. The sun is shining and the sky is blue, and all would be well if Andy and I hadn't just discovered, thanks to RAC Routeplanner, that there's still a ridiculous 1,600kms between us and Asia.

The satisfaction of reaching Croatia two days ago was countered by our disappointment at having to leave Slovenia. The week or so that we spent walking through it was nicely finished off by an early morning border crossing (with our first passport-check since Dover), following our descent through the hills seen photographed in fetching Sepia tones below.

On we raced into Croatia, where for some reason summer was back in full swing after our Slovenian autumn. As yet we have no real feel for the country as our experience has been restricted to the suburbs of Zagreb, which seem to stretch almost all the way to the border. But apart from the mildly worring Italian driving ethic, the people have all been friendly and curious (see photograph below, of a passing consultation from the Zagrebi Cartographic Society), and we've a good fortnight or so of countryside coming up in which to get a proper feel of the country before we're spat out at the other end into Serbia (oooooh- Serbia! Landmines!)

It's now less than 2 months until we aim to cross the bridge in Istanbul between Europe and Asia. Andy has now booked his flight to New York for the marathon on the 5th of November, so a definite end is in sight. A very curious feeling, he assures me. This means, importantly, that A DATE IS SET! On the 31st of october we will be hosting a bridge-side reception (BYOBoc*, dress code: rambling) with an open invitation to one and all (conditional on reciept of sponsorship by that date, dear friends). We already have a whole host of exciting people with flights booked, but as with all these things, the more the merrier.

*- of champagne please. No Cava.

And that concludes the news for today. We'll leave you with our fond farewells, and this current travel advice from our friends at the Foreign Office...

"...be careful not to stray from roads and paved areas without an experienced guide. If you are planning to travel outside the normal tourist resorts you should be aware that there are areas affected by the war, which ended in 1995, where unexploded mines remain. Areas include the Danube region (Eastern Slavonia) [which means, of course, the main walking route from London to Istanbul]. You should be wary about leaving cultivated land or marked paths."

Perhaps we should consider replacing our walking sticks with metal detectors??

Regards and thanks, as usual,

Paddy and Andy

30th August 2006

2006-08-30T00:03:00.000-07:00

We have reached Slovenia! And not only that, we are already in the capital, Ljublubljublana.

Leaving Italy was a little less dramatic than our high altitude arrival, with less of the heroic summiting of mountain peaks as dawn broke, and more clambering through a hedgerow into someones garden in the drizzle. Since then we have had the most fantastic two days pottering through gorgeous countryside like that seen in the photos below, taken the morning after a thunderstorm that deposited hailstones the size of watermelons on our now rather beleagered tents.

We arrived in the capital yesterday and spent the night with the British deputy ambassador and his wife, Mr and Mrs Setterfield, who treated us royally and fed us on mighty amounts of shepherds pie and rhubarb (No Ferrero Rocher though, which is always a pity) Today we decamped to the Celica Hostel, which youd be hard pressed to know was once a military prison. Tonight we might partake in a half of ale, or two, to re-celebrate some milestone or other, and then its off tomorrow for the short 150km dash to Zagreb.

Another highly exciting milestone is my purchase today of a shiny new pair of trainers! The old ones eventually died a glorious death on the final stretch into town yesterday. They had, since Trafalgar Square, consumed 1 tube of superglue, 2 pairs of laces, 3 sets of insoles, 4 maids-a-milking and 5 countries. They are currently in an envelope winging their way back to my mother (almost under their own steam) in Shropshire, where they will look lovely on the mantelpiece.

Not much news to report apart from the above. I have no idea, either, why I am now writing in blue and underlined, but these Slovenian computers are a curious breed. Many thanks again to everyone who has sponsored us. Keep telling the world about our good cause (mind you, after the article in the Windsor Times this week, I'd say most people probably know) and we-ll be back in touch again as soon as something exciting happens.

Regards from the Balkans,

Paddy and Andy

24th August 2006

2006-08-24T02:49:00.001-07:00

Hello to you all. This will hopefully be our last blog from Italy (where the appalingly miserable excuses for internet cafes are starting to really test our patience, and the bronze-age computers crash even more often than their cars.)

We are currently in the hot sweaty town of Latisana some 85km from the Slovenian border. More importatly than that two days ago we reached the biggest landmark of our expedition so far, the Adriatic Sea! Our 40km long day ended on the British and German lobster-people filled beaches at Lido di Jesolo. However all attention was diverted from the bikini clad woman (and, most unpleasantly, men in far less...) to the bright blue sea that stretched across the horizon before us. Armed with a cold beer we collapsed into the cool refreshing water. This was not only our first and only sea but also sybolised the half way point between London and Asia. It also marks our transition from Western to Eastern Europe and we are very much looking forward to leaving Italy and exploring the much less touristy central Balkans. Having both obviously mastered Italian we are also looking for the challenge of a new lauguage.

Other than that there is little to report that can't be guessed at from our last blog. We are still very much living rough, but with the added entertainment of frequent starvation rations. Each morning on arrival in or breakfast-town it is a guessing game as to whether we will eat that day or whether the Local holiday of the Feast of the Joyous Second Ascension of The Venerable and Munificent St Lazario will prevent us from feeding while the locals barricade themselves inside to feast on wine, wafers and song. Without intervention from the odd heathen local, weighed down with homegrown fruit and veg for us, we could well have starved several times over by now. Let's hope the Slovenians are a less pious bunch.

The roads and traffic have been similarly frustrating. The stifling heat of the afternoon forces us to walk from dawn until lunch, when the traffic is both interminable and chaotic, and then from late afternoon to sundown, when the returning comuters, overjoyed with finishing their day's work, celebrate by trying to run us down. All the more reason to flee to Slovenia, where the charging ferraris will be replaced by chuntering Yugos.

Otherwise, the walking has been pleasant, though hot. We had one small break in the weather, and got caught in the mother of all storms. We walked through it, intent on reaching a lake which we had been reliably informed was quite stunning, and where we intended on swimming our troubles away. After the 50km walk we were disappopinted by the swamp which confronted us at our destination. Not to be disheartened, we cheered ourselvers by spending that night in a graveyard. It was perhaps here where Andy managed to pick up an eye infection (hayfever from all those flowers, again?). The offending eye turned all sorts of funny hues and I was miserable to be told that perhaps a retreat to a motel might be neccasary. I spent a dreadfull 24 hours watching Sattelite TV in the reluctant comfort of the room, eating hot meals and drinking Guinness at unconventional hours. We were both overjoyed to be back on the highways and byeways the next day, among the roadkill and mosquitoes. (Many thanks due at this point to the charming duo of Sylvia and Alice, who gave us freebie after freebie from the hotel bar and kitchens)

AND NOW, MOST IMPORTANTLY, NEWS OF THIS YEAR'S MOST TALKED ABOUT 'EVENT'!
We have made a highly conjectural prediction of an Istanbulian bridge-crossing date of a day either side of the 31st of October. We have several recruits already, and are looking for more. Istanbul is an incredibly cool city, and we will be there having a bit of a shindig. Have a think about joining us. It's-all-made-easy-by-Easyjet, flights coming in at about a hundred quid (return) and operating most days of the week. You know you want to.

Other than that all that remains is for us to say a big thankyou to everyone who has sent encouraging text messages and emails, but most of all everyone who has donated their hard earned etc to the Red Cross in the name of our esteemed cause. We had a thought this morning- Make it your project, if you read this, to forward the blog address on to 5 people. It's better than recieving spam about free Novocaine, and it will also bring you good luck for 7 years.

Thanks again to one and all,

Kind Regards,

Paddy and Andy

"Sitting in a bus station, got no ticket for my destination..."

2006-08-24T02:49:00.000-07:00

11th August 2006

2006-08-12T02:25:00.000-07:00

Here is, in response to public demand, our long awaited blog update, telexed in at our Chiswick headquarters from the rambling frontline (No mans land?).

The last you heard we were in Aosta, which was a fantastic town. We made friends with generous Scottish bar staff at the Old English Distillery, where the free drinks flowed like water - fizzy hops flavoured water. We drank sponsorable quantities, and our hangovers accompanied us along the road for some days.

With the Alps far behind us we set off across the monotonous North Italian plain. The only crop found here is rice, and the quagmires in which it is grown provide meagre opportunities for rough camping, but paradise on earth for mosquitoes. Word quickly spread that Paddy’s legs were in the neighbourhood, and for a week or two, clouds of these parasitic groupies chased us from swamp to swamp. It was Hitchcock in miniature, Paddy collecting forty two confirmed bites in twenty four hours, with a similar number of kills. Andy, thinking he got off lightly with his paltry three bites was yet to discover his own nemesis … the crayfish.

Mosquito Heaven

Just as mother nature was about to crush our spirits completely, we were rescued by a night in a shining Alfa. Mark Struthers, having sold himself to the Devil, or at least the Devils accountant, flew out to Milan for one last taste of the good life. Armed with fly rods we headed north for a few days fishing in the Italian Alps, or so we thought.

To cut a long and boring story short, a squat Italian bureaucrat refused to give us a permit. Desperate times called for a desperate road trip, and the roll of a dice told us to go to Austria. After an epic 11 hour drive, and a few phone calls to the Austrian aristocracy, we found ourselves installed in a cosy woodcutters cottage, sipping whiskey in front of a log fire. Our host, Fritz Hardegg, provided us with some fantastic trout fishing, schnapps fuelled evening entertainment with his charming family and friends and a tour of his impressive and vast estate.

Smug .....

Alas the good life had to come to an end. Mark drove us back to our starting point, before returning back to London. We loaded up our packs and hit the road once more. Mark, you are an absolute legend for organising such an amazing break, and for fuelling us with so much good food and booze.

For the last four weeks we have been continuously sleeping rough. We set off this morning between five and six, in a vain effort to beat the heat. The roads in these parts are monotonously straight, which is great for covering distance, but also allow the Italian drivers to reach perilous speeds, often forcing us in to ditches and hedgerows. We brake at about twelve to sit out the heat, until around five o’clock, afterwards we crack on for another hour or two, in search of an inconspicuous stop where we can cook and rest our weary legs. Washing, however, is a different matter. We have had just two showers in the last five weeks on the road, and we are reliant on rivers and streams to wash. Our luck was to change, as yesterday we met Sammy Maccagnola, who was insisted on looking after us for the afternoon. Before we knew it, we were squeaky clean, and sitting round the kitchen table in borrowed clothes, eating punnits of ice-cream with his mother, father, sister, brother, aunt, cousin and baby niece. The generosity then extended to an enormous and delicious supper, a tour of a nearby town, plentiful glasses of various home made alcoholic concoctions, and a roof over our heads for the night.

We reluctantly said our farewells this morning after a hearty breakfast, and set off to the town from which the update comes. Our lunch break is now over, and it is time for us to move on. Somewhere out there, there is a hedgerow with our name on it.

Please keep spreading the rambling word - there’s lots of money still to raise.

Loads of love Andy and Paddy.

Just another Whisky sunset

10th August 2006

2006-08-10T07:51:00.000-07:00

Good afternoon all. Just a very quick update, as we've had trouble finding intertnet access in italy. However, we've just been taken in by a lovely Italian family who, after hosing us down and scrubbing our clothes, and feeding us copious amounts of ice-cream, have allowed us to use their internet.
We'll do our best to give a proper update in a few days time, but until then suffice to say we are alive and well, and chugging along nicely. We've reached the environs of Verona, and are excitedly looking at lots of maps of Slovenia and beyond. We're both in good health, the weather, though hot, is just about bearable, and all is well. We hope you are too.

A proper update and lots of photos to follow. Love to one and all from the two of us.

Paddy and Andy.

23rd July 2006

2006-07-23T06:32:00.000-07:00

Boun Giorno! We have, 6 days after arriving in Switzerland, reached Italy! We crossed the border at 9,250 ft at sunrise yesterday morning, and celebrated with the traditional triumphant breakfast of curried noodles.

It had been a long 3 days from Martigny, up and down cliffside paths in the sweltering heat, ending each day a little higher than where we'd finished the previous night. This cumibnated with yesterday's dawn climb up what we hoped would be a gentle ski-slope, but transpired to be a 3,000ft rubble-strewn scree-slope which steepened to such a vertical gradient that it almost defeated us. On eventually reaching the top we found two abandoned deckchairs into which we slumped, exhausted, surrounded by breathtaking views of the snowcapped peaks of France to the west, Switzerland to the north, and Italy to the south.

From this mountain-top border-crossing it has been a two day descent to the suprisingly pretty town of Aosta. From here we hope to reach Milan in the next two weeks. We will keep you posted.

Regards,

Andy and Paddy

19th July 2006

2006-07-19T03:49:00.000-07:00

Welcome to our blog. Its the same as our Justgiving site, but it allows us to post photos (many thanks to Mr and Mrs Ward for the camera!) so check here for updates from now on, but keep donating at the original site (www.justgiving.com/paddymorris).

The last you will have heard was that I was lost in Geneva, a horrid town which seemed to go on and on for ever. A horrendous thunderstorm accompanied me all the way to St. Jeroire, where I celebrated the end of a 60km day by sleeping rough in a quarry without any supper. Leaving at 5 the next morning I raced to Morzine where I planned to wait for Andy. I spent a lovely week crashing at Liz's flat. Vicks and James and Ollie and Loucho and Becs and everyone and anyone seemed to be there. Lots of barbecues (big shout out to Anthony for letting me come to his birthday party and giving me some trousers. I wear them with pride) , lots of nights out, days spent drinking coffee in the sun, walks (urgh) to the slate mines, etc etc.

After a week Andy, with leg almost fully recovered, arrived. Although he was eager to crack on right away I, being used to life at these dizzy altitudes, insisted on a harsh 48 hour acclimatisation regime. We practised fluid intake untill dawn, at which point altitude sickness got the better of us and we passed out. After our recovery we bravely shook off our headaches and made for Switzerland.

We set of bright and early at about 11 o'clock. The sun shone, and coffee oozed through our pores like grease from a kebab.

We headed up a steep mountain track to the Col de Coux and the Franco-Swiss border. As Andy's fitness was still clearly suffering from life in Blighty, I reached the top first. Seeing Andy "resting" a km or so below me I dashed down into Switzerland to gather snowballs from a little snow hollow, for a refreshing ambush that we could both enjoy. However, reaching the top again my snowballs had congealed to a hefty boulder of ice. For fear of breaking his other leg I reluctantly handed it over as an ice-pack. As we lunched on super-noodles, the weather closed in, and the heavens opened up. We were forced to wait out a couple of hours before making the descent into Switzerland, where we pitched our tents on the banks of an alpine stream flowing fresh from a glacier 100m above us. As you can see from the following photos, nothing was more pleasurable and relaxing than the soothing baths we enjoyed under the waterfall next to our tents.

Though intending to start early, a surfeit of porridge laced with wild strawberries knocked us both out. After 2 hours sleep we rose again at 10, to set of on what we could tell from the map was going to be a very sketchy climb. Arriving at the botom of a near-vertical climb we broke off for a quick bite. I went off in search of bread from a nearby refuge leaving Andy to cut the saucisson. On my return, I found Andy had acquired, from Lord knows where, a donkey. His mother had apparently advised him that should his bag become too heavy a donkey might be an effective solution.

Andy writes: Paddy seemed suprised that I'd found a donkey, and expressed concern that we might have to split our food three ways. Alas, the path steepened to a near-vertical ascent. Only a thin chain, delicately affixed to the rock face, provided assistance from the "you fall - you die" climb, and it was with great reluctance that I left Trigger behind. Paddy's rationing concerns were assuaged.

After a 45 minute, 500 metre climb, we emerged at the bottom of an enormous glacial trough, surrounded on all sides by snow-covered mountain peaks. We were also very suprised to find ourselves in the midst of eine kleine gruppen of stark naked Germans. Such a sight is not normally suprising, of course, but 6,000 ft up a glacier, with no piles of discarded clothing in evidence, it made us wonder if perhaps they weren't Germans at all, but defrosted Neanderthals, celebrating global warming with a pool party. Not seeking an invite we slunk off through the boulders for a 3 hour climb through the snow to the top of the arrete above us.

The descent was as hairy as the Germans. Forbidden by our own rules to use our rucksacks as tobboggans we shinned down cliff-faces (see photo below), slipped over snow-fields, dodged marmottes and chamoises, traversed gorges and waded through mountain streams for a couple of hours to Salanfe Lake where we pitched our tents. We ate a hearty supper of couscous (apparently for 9 people), looking up at the afternoon's descent.

The next day was an uneventful walk through steep zigzagging paths from Salanfe at 7,000ft to Martigny at 1,000ft. Perhaps the 'stand-out' memory from the day was an unusual demonstration of Swiss neutrality. While ambling along a track that sloped past a mountian village, Andy called out to me from behind, "Check out that dude in his garden with an air-rifle!" Spotting him, I replied "Yeah look- He's watching us through his 'scope." Barely had the words escaped my lips, when a shot rang out and a bullet thumped into the tree trunk between us. Not used to conflict situations, we followed the least advisable course of action. We stopped dead in our tracks, turned round, and hurled abuse. As he reloaded, we saw a potentially fatal flaw in our handling of the situation, and maintaining discipline under fire, whilest slow-marching out of air-rifle range, we sang 'Jerusalem' at the tops of our voices. It wasn't until afterwards that we realised that this must have been the first time in history that the Swiss had opened fire on the Red Cross.

We are now relaxing tired but unscathed in Martigny, collecting maps for our next three days at the end of which we hope to be in Italy.

Keep the emails, text messages, and most importantly donations coming. They are all much appreciated.

Paddy and Andy

14th July 2006

2006-07-15T02:29:00.000-07:00

The view from the slate mines above Lake Montriond